Wednesday, February 08, 2006

How do I thank you?

I have a lot of wonderful people in my life. And I'm aware of that every single day. For insatnce, I know that if I just disappeared, someone would notice. It's a comforting thing sometimes in this city. :)

But more than that, I know that when things get hard - I have a cavalry. I have people in my life, that though they are thousands of miles away, would do whatever they could to support, defend, comfort me. And while when things get rough, I don't always make that call, as I should - but knowing in my heart I can, it makes all the difference.

Sometimes you get a small peak into someone else's life and it washes over you like a wave. Your life, the blessings, the rich abundance of what can only be attributed to sheer luck. I do not deserve the many many riches that surround me. The family I have, the friends that have grown to become as much. My heart breaks it is so full of thanks. So full of gratitude. For these people. These beings that have known me, that have seen me for who I am - and, miraculously, have loved me regardless.

It is these times specifically, I feel at a loss as to how I can ever pay them back. In truth, I cannot. I will never be able to properly tell them thank you. But they have shown me, in their ever-abundant kindness how best I can. How I can turn to the one next to me, the one who hasn't necessarily this amazing wealth, and give mine to them.

It is in the sharing that the gratitude is given. In the small attempts of allocating the love I have that the joy is multiplied. Hopefully, you see that. That in so many ways, you have shown me the person I want to be. And as I strive for that; each act, each hopeful step forward is done with gratitude in my heart for you.

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