Sunday, November 02, 2008


She's changing every day. Growing, becoming more "her." Or, rather, learning how best to show us who she is. She has definite opinions now, preferences; she knows what pleases her - or rather, doesn't. It's wonderful to watch.

She talks more now too. She'll sit and sing with her daddy, or curl up with me and have whole conversations. I get the feeling now she's understanding more and more of what we say. I find both of us when she cries asking her to tell us what's wrong - which seems silly, I know - but she oftentimes will stop crying and in a very sad, pathetic little voice begin to actually do just that.

And oh, her faces. When she's sad it's enough to break my heart. Though when she smiles and giggles it seems my whole world brightens. She's only belly laughed once (a few weeks ago when her Aunt Leslie Stiers was here) but those smiles are enough for me. Every morning, when she wakes up next to me and Sam she looks around and fusses a bit, and then when she sees us she breaks into the greatest little grins.

I'm searching in these entries to convey to you how much I love her. How I can't remember life without her. But words fail me. All I can say is that my heart is full. I would have never imagined being so in love with my husband. Being married to my bestest friend, that he'd be such an amazing husband: that I would marry the guy I'd been dreaming about for so long. That this guy would even exist. And then, above and beyond that - I would be lucky enough to have a child with him. A child so wonderful and amazing. So sweet and already kind.

I can't. There's no way to convey to you. But I'll keep trying. One miserably written entry at a time.

No comments: